We Need an Ark

It's raining here.  It's been raining for two weeks.  Okay, I'm being dramatic... it's been raining for three or four days.  Honestly, I've lost count and don't recall exactly when the rain started. 

It's miserable.  I know we need the rain, I know.  But I'm a big believer in MODERATION.  And days and days and days on end of non-stop rain is Weather Apeshittery.  I half expect Cassidy to come home from school this afternoon in an ark.

So I got to thinking about Noah's Ark and decided to see if Tim Hawkins had anything to say about ol' Noah.  Sure enough, he did.  And it just might be funny enough to get me through this miserable non-stop rainstorm.

Tooth Fairy 101

The Tooth Fairy made a stop at our house last night to leave Cassidy a note.  We have an awful lot of kids on our street, so she must have been nearby!

Cassidy's tooth hasn't come out yet, but it won't be long.  It seems the Tooth Fairy knew this and wanted to pop in for reassurance and to set expectations. 

In case you can't read it, the note says:


Dear Princess Cassidy,

I'm so happy you're finally about to start losing your baby teeth!  I've been waiting for such a long time to come visit you! 

Please remember to put your tooth in your Tooth Monster pillow so I know just where to find them.  I have some wonderful things planned for you!

I love you,

The Tooth Fairy


Cassidy was excited to learn the Tooth Fairy leaves a beautiful trail of glitter behind her as she flies around.  We found a trail of silver glitter from her window straight to the spot on her dresser where the note was propped.

She was so excited, she took the note to school to show Mrs. H and Mrs. P.

Let the fun begin!

The Best Birthday Weekend EVER

We had a great weekend!!  I truly believe this was the best birthday I've had so far.  First thing Saturday morning, I hopped out of bed ready to celebrate my big day.  A few seconds later, a gravelly voice interrupted the silence.

Sergeant Sexy: Does it hurt to walk when you turn 36?

Me: Yes.  Does it hurt to talk when I punch you in the mouth?

I'm 2.5 months older than Sergeant Sexy, and he lords it over me every chance he gets.  It's always a treat, but the 2.5 months when my age is one digit ahead of his are especially fun.  He doesn't waste a minute of it.

Once we got going I took Campbell to Gymboree.  She was an excellent listener and we had a ball through both classes.  That alone was enough to make my birthday fantastic, but it got better!

When we got home, Sergeant Sexy and Cassidy had been out shopping. Cassidy picked out a very sweet Mother figurine from Hallmark and they got a cake from Coldstone Creamery.  WOW!!

After we had lunch and cake, Campbell went down for a nap.  And guess what? I got to take a nap, too!

Saturday evening, Sergeant Sexy took me to dinner at The Melting Pot.  I lurve The Melting Pot.  LURVE. IT.  They never disappoint, and dinner was outstanding as usual.

The girlz stayed with Mama and Papa while we were at dinner.  Saint Mama had wonderful news for us when we picked them up - Cassidy had her first loose tooth!

The girlz were fighting off a cold Sunday morning so we skipped church.  New Nana brought lunch and cupcakes for my birthday, and presents for the girlz of course.

We went to Mama and Papa's house Sunday afternoon for an impromptu family gathering.  It was really fun to have all the siblings together at the same time.  The girlz got unlimited attention from their family, and Papa shared a bizarre story about Samoa cookies that brought Aunt Harley to tears.

It was a birthday I'll never forget.

Campbell loves Gymboree Art!!

And she loves Gymboree Play, too!

Aunt Harley, Uncle Munka Moose, Aunt Never-Says-No, Saint Mama, Papa, Uncle Butthead, and Me

Cassidy and Saint Mama

Cassidy and Pop

Cassidy decided she wanted to walk home from Saint Mama and Papa's house, so Saint Mama played along.  Bye!!

Happy Birthday To Me!

36 years ago today I made my grand entrance into this world, ass first.  My poor Mom really got a raw deal.  I was born in a time when a breech baby didn't automatically qualify you for a c-section.  Even worse, she wasn't given an epidural.  I've decided she should be given Sainthood for the damage I'm certain I must have done.  She's never mentioned it, but I know what's happened to my friends who had babies correctly positioned for blast-off.  From now on, I'll refer to her as Saint Mama.

Thank you Saint Mama, for loving me even after I tore you up.

And after I drew on the wall in the game room.

And even when I borrowed your car without asking first.

And so on, and so on, and so on...

Cracker Butters

I was packing Cassidy's lunch this morning, which was trickier than usual.  I wasn't supposed to send anything that needed an icepack because her class is going on a field trip today.  Mrs. H specifically requested her lunch be sent in a disposable bag, and I took that to mean she wanted everything inside the bag to be disposable as well.

I had decided to send a frozen peanut butter and jelly Uncrustable, but Cassidy said she didn't want one today.  I offered to make peanut butter crackers instead and she agreed.

Campbell watched as I made the stack of peanut butter crackers.  And since she cannot be outdone, she decided she needed to eat one of her sister's crackers.  Immediately.

Little C is at the stage where she's sorting through the English language and often gets her words mixed up.  One of my favorite Campbell terms is her word for peanut butter crackers: "Cracker Butters".  It's adorable and hilarious, and luckily this morning I was finally able to catch it on video while she was still in an agreeable mood.

One thing is certain - I won't miss one minute of the tantrums, the screaming, or power struggles that come with being two years old.  But there's a whole other side that I adore - the pure, unashamed, loving sweetness that only a two year old can share.  Those moments are pure joy... see for yourself!

A Bike Ride... Kind Of.

We got the bikes out after dance class tonight and let the girlz ride around our cul-de-sac.

To be fair, it was really only Cassidy that did any actual riding.  Campbell is still learning how to pedal and didn't get too far.

I asked Cassidy when she'd like to take off her training wheels.  True to overly cautious form, she said never... so I'm thinking about taking them off this weekend.  We can always put them back on, right?

Campbell was more interested in ringing the bell than learning to make the tricycle go.

Evenings Like This...

I'm a sucker for Fall and Spring.  The colors, the weather, the energy and excitement of the changing season... I thrive on it.  The weather in this area is mild and gorgeous in the Fall and Spring, and the spectacular show Mother Nature puts on when the leaves change is breathtaking.

We spent some time outside after dinner this evening.  We broke out the chalk and let the girls loose on the front sidewalk.  It's not nearly cool enough for a sweatshirt, but I feel like I want to put one on anyway.  The air already has that crisp, earthy smell only Fall can bring.

I love it.  I absolutely love it!

Look at the cat she drew!!!  Where on earth did that talent come from?!?

This has to be the longest hopscotch board I've ever seen!

See the look on Campbell's face?  She's plotting.  I took this picture 3 seconds before Campbell gave Cassidy a good push from behind.  She is 100% her Uncle Butthead... and I don't know if I should laugh or cry.

An Easy Weekend

We decided to go low-key this weekend and just take it easy.  We did as little as possible and tried to recover from the Marathon of Non-Stop Fun we've been running since late May.  It was a really nice change of pace!

We let the girlz put on their bathing suits and splash around in the backyard yesterday afternoon.  They had been asking to go to the pool, but our neighborhood pool and the swim club across the street have closed.  We could have gone to the Y, but that would have taken far too much time and effort.

Notice the stream of green snot running from Little C's precious nose.

Bargain Diva

I have a problem.  I'm addicted to coupons and bargains.  To me, it's a game to see what I can get for the lowest out of pocket amount.  I like to think it keeps my mind sharp.

Sergeant Sexy tends to poke fun and make jokes, but I don't care.  Especially on days like today.

As Cassidy was getting off the bus, FedEx was leaving two gigantic boxes of Cottonelle Double Roll toilet paper on our doorstep.  It cost a grand total of $15.05.

Point and laugh all you want.  It's all fun and games until somebody needs to use the potty!

Our Night Away

This past weekend we finally had a night to ourselves, so we spent our evening with 100,000 other people watching a NASCAR race.  We normally only go to one race a year, but the opportunity to meet some friends came up.  And off we went!

Although Nascar came with the marriage, I still hesitate to call myself a Nascar Fan.  Sergeant Sexy is the true Nascar Fan... he's the one that can pick Kyle Petty out of a crowd.  I've decided I'm a Fan of NASCAR Fans... especially NASCAR Fans that have been drinking.

Ya wanna see some funny stuff?  Go to a Nascar race.  On the way to the track we passed an old mattress propped against a tree with "Jeff Gordon is gay" spray painted in big black letters.  I watched one guy taunt another shouting "LOSER DRIVER!"... hilarious!  But my favorite drunken NASCAR Fans have to be the group we parked next to in 2002.  They had an Elvis bust that they sat up in their tailgate area and talked to like a real person.  That was classic.

I admit, I was a bit worried about going to such a large public venue on September 11th, but everything was fine.

I found a cool way to wear our American Flags

Sergeant Sexy and Kristen

A skydiver brought a gigantic American Flag into the track... so cool!

The hotel we stayed in was super nice.  It's our new favorite!

What a Crazy Week!

It's been a crazy week, but the good news is the weekend is just a few hours away.  Campbell spent most of the week in a bad mood.  She's become obsessed with the Doodlebops and wants them on all TVs at all times.  Unfortunately, I don't have time to accomodate her every wish in the frantic morning rush.  This sets her off.  She pulled the Back Arching Anti-Car Seat Manuever on me as I was trying to get Cassidy to the bus stop yesterday.  It was lovely.  I got smart this morning and found Cassidy's old Doodlebops book for Campbell to carry around, and this made her happy.  Score one for Mommy!

Cassidy was sick Tuesday and Wednesday.  Not only did she miss Picture Day at school, she also missed the first dance class of the season.  This made her mad, but she was too sick to throw too much of a fuss over it.

Campbell's language skills are really taking off.  I was wiping her face this morning and a tiny eye boogie was stuck to her eyelid.  She dramatically cried out "MY EYEBALL!!  MY EYEBALL!!" as if I was trying to sever her optic nerves and burn her retinas.  I felt bad for laughing, but her attempts at drama become even funnier with every new word she learns.

The girlz get to have a sleepover with Mama and Papa this weekend.  I suspect they'll be disappointed to learn they're getting one sleepover and not ten.  We'll let Mama and Papa break that news.

Ready for the bus!

Labor Day Weekend - Day 3

Well, we're at the end of our long weekend.  The girlz will definitely be going to bed early tonight and I'll be right behind them.

We started the morning bright and early with breakfast at Cracker Barrel.  We got there veeeeeeeeeery early, so the crowd was super-light.  We were able to get in and out before either of the girlz had a chance to dig into their bag of party tricks.  The crowd was much heavier by the time we left, so we were extra glad the girlz got up so early today.

We took the long way home and relaxed at the house before heading to Mama and Papa's.

Cassidy loves Papa's computer.  The Nick Jr website is her favorite, and she made Dora Valentine cards for Mama, Papa, Campbell, and herself.  Notice she didn't make one for me or Daddy.  She also asked if she could have 10 sleepovers at Mama and Papa's house.  I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid - I can see she's slowly trying to ease me and Daddy out of the picture.  Whatever.

The other day she told me Tuesdays are her favorite school day because she has Computer Class on Tuesdays (the other classes are Art, Music, World Studies, PE, and Library).  She's so much like Papa, I have to laugh.  She even looks like Papa sitting there!

We went to the new FroYo place up the street this afternoon and it was awesome.  It's decorated really cool and there's tons of flavors and toppings to choose from.  The girlz did exceptionally well... there wasn't even the slightest hint of a Stiff Leg Manuever, Back Arching Anti-Carseat Spasm, or Floor Flapping Screamfest Routine.  Overwhelming success!

Cassidy loves FroYo!

And Campbell loves FroYo, too!

This neighboring business is going to love the fingerprints and crazy antics we left on their surveillance video.  It should provide hours of workplace entertainment tomorrow.

Labor Day Weekend - Day 2

Another crazy day has gone down in the books.  I'm starting to get run down but the girlz don't seem to be fazed one bit.  Go figure!

We went to church this morning and Cassidy wore her pageant dress.  She asked to wear it last weekend but I had already decided they were going to wear their matching dresses.  I promised she could wear it today and I made good on that promise.  She got lots of compliments, of course.  It's no surprise, really... she could wear a box to our church and nobody would bat an eyelash.

I had her hair pulled back, but that turkey took it out before I could get a picture.

After church we ran by the store and picked up everything under the sun EXCEPT what we went there to get.  We can't possibly be the only people that do that.  Right?  Right?!?

Campbell laid down to take a nap but had a hard time settling down.  Turns out she was too busy playing "Shoe Store" to nap... I got this picture after she'd finally fallen asleep.  I counted twelve shoes in her bed, one of which is on her left foot. 

She's so odd and awesome all at the same time.

We went to Meredith/Lindsey/Katie's house for a Labor Day party this afternoon.  I let Cassidy in on a secret once we got to their house.  Marissa and her family were there!  The Pink-os were inseparable from the time they laid eyes on each other until Marissa's family left.

Campbell wore her Dee Dee Doodle costume to the party.  She's obsessed with the Doodlebops right now (she calls them the "Do-Bocks").

Cassidy and Daddy playing Cornhole.

Campbell and her new friend Caleb.  Caleb isn't really a new friend - we've been at a countless number of parties and events with his family over the last 2 or 3 years.  Caleb and Campbell just discovered each other today and played together so nicely.  I sat and watched them for a long time... not because they needed a referee (I didn't have to intervene once), but because it was so sweet to watch.

Cassidy in the bounce house!

Lindsey, Meredith, Katie and their parents know how to throw a fantastic party!

Tomorrow should be another fun day, but I'm a little sad too.  Our gorgeous three-day weekend is quickly coming to an end!

Labor Day Weekend - Day 1

Whew... what a jam-packed day!  We started the day at Build-A-Bear Workshop.  Cassidy has been twice, but Campbell has never gone.  We thought she might be getting old enough to understand it, so we gave it a chance.  We were 90% successful... she participated in almost everything and didn't show the store any of her party tricks (the Floor Flapping Screamfest Routine being most notable).  I call that success.

She chose Hello Kitty as expected, and Cassidy picked Keroppi the frog.

Kissing Hello Kitty's heart

Putting a heart in Cassidy's Keroppi 

Cassidy giving Keroppi a bath 

 Campbell putting on Hello Kitty's panties 

Cassidy and Keroppi 

Hello Kitty (Campbell had stopped cooperating by then) 

 Packed up and ready to go! 

After we left Build-A-Bear, we walked to the toy store to look around.  Sergeant Sexy found the most wonderful thing EVER... a Snoopy Snow Cone Machine!!!  The best part?  It looks JUST like the one we had at our house when I was little!

I HAD TO HAVE IT.

After we left the shopping area, we headed to Madison's birthday party.  We were running a few minutes early, so we stopped by Mama and Papa's house to kill time.  They weren't there, but that didn't stop us from drinking their milk, and eating their cookies.  Papa, have you noticed your package of Grasshopper cookies is nearly empty?  I'm not telling who ate them (it was Campbell)... just pointing it out in case you didn't notice.

Madison had a pool party to celebrate her 5th birthday.  Her little sister goes to school with Campbell, so both girlz had a blast.  Madison lives on a farm, and halfway through the party some of their rescue horses walked over to see what all the fuss was about. 

Happy Birthday, Madison!

Cassidy taking a turn at the pinata... she's already asked to have a pinata at her next birthday party.

Candy!!!  Run!!!

Cassidy and my beloved Snoopy Snow Cone Machine.

Campbell waiting for her snow cone.

It's EXACTLY the same as the one we used to have.  I LOVE IT!!!!

Stayed tuned for more fun tomorrow.  Cassidy is planning to wear a very special outfit to church and we'll be spending the afternoon at Meredith/Lindsey/Katie's house.  It's sure to be another great day!

At this point, we're not sure what we'll do Monday.  Sleep sounds like a good choice to me, but I suspect the girlz will disagree.